Assumptions

My little boy saw it first, rustling in the grass next to the trail. His quick glance caught my eye, and then I saw it too. It moved fast, then stopped as I edged closer, careful not to make too much noise, for fear of scaring it away. I was pretty sure I knew what it was, but I had to see for myself. Finally, I was able to make out the small snake, which kept very still, eyeing me cautiously. I smiled and whispered to my son to come closer and look. He crouched down and looked carefully before  announcing with all the authority a ten-year-old could possess, "it's not a venomous snake. I can tell by the shape of its head."

My husband is very good at examining things in nature to find out if they are dangerous or benign. It comes from a lifetime of interest in the subject, survival training in the military, and a degree in biology. It seems that, wherever there is something dangerous, there is often an innocent look-alike, using their dangerous appearance as a defense mechanism.

This doesn't worry my husband. He knows what to look for, and he studies it carefully before determining its identity. Whether it is an animal, a plant, or a mushroom, he gets to know it before making a judgement. He gets to know it before he sees it with research and training, then he studies it in person to compare what he has learned.

Today I had a beautiful opportunity to spend time with someone I thought I knew. I see this lovely lady on a regular basis, but always assumed she didn't think much of me. I didn't really have a solid reason for thinking that, and, looking back, I'm not sure why I ever thought it at all.

A few days ago, she mentioned that she thought I was hard to read. She wasn't sure what I was thinking. I found this incredibly amusing, considering I felt the same way about her, so I told her so. Her response to me was fantastic. She declared that it was time to get to know each other. So today, having a rare weekday off from work, I acted on it and asked her to have lunch with me. I'm so glad I did.

This has me wondering how we determine where people fit into our lives. I always hear the question "what is love" - it's the subject of dozens of songs, books, and movies. But I wonder what friendship is, and how it happens. Twice - that I know of - in the last year, I have misjudged someone. I'm so glad, in this case, to find out I was wrong.